Rebel

I am in the habit of or at least I used to be of visiting the graves of those that have passed on and talking to them telling them what has been happening. Today I had the opportunity to do it again. As most are aware of my cousin passed away in November. I miss her terribly and today I went to her grave I wanted to see the stone that was not there at her funereal and I was not sure what I would do when I got there but, I cried a lot like when it first happened and I realize how much she meant to me and how much I miss her. she was my friend and someone I could laugh with someone I could cry to and know she would listen. In turn I did the same for her. I can not help but feel like maybe I could have done something to save her. and the over whelming sense of guilt is not something I can shake. next week is her birthday and I will be going again to see her grave and putting flowers on it and sending up a balloon to her in Heaven with all my love. letting go is hard and I am not so sure I am ready to do that just yet but, maybe one day I will. I know she is in a better place and she is not in pain for that I am thankful. My life has been better for having her in it and I will never forget my Rebel cousin Becky.

My baby is not a baby anymore

We are in the habit of being outside when the weather is nice. Today it got to 60 and it was beautiful. Khirali and Hunter were riding their bikes and Khirali decided to ask to have her training wheels taken off. so I did and off she goes scooting along and then putting her feet on the pedals and then she loses her balance. after about 20 min. she got the hang of it my baby is riding her bike with out the trainging wheels of course we made a huge deal of it. and she is so excited that she is showing everyone. I have to say they grow up so fast and I am a little sad to think that my baby is well on her way to being a young lady. on the other hand it also means she starts school next year and then it all goes up from there. so freedom here we come or not at least we still have our habits. TTFN

A good man

We are in the habit of making the oh so familiure trip down the Gorge. yet today was for a different reason. We went to say goodbye to a good man. A man that has had a big impact on my familys life. If it were not for the man Clark Riley we may still be in Dufur (which is not a bad place to live) working four jobs between us and not really going any where. Clark offered Rich a job therefore we moved and here we are today. maybe not at the top of life but we are in a good place. Clark shall be missed. The world will be different without you here. To the family our prayers go out to you. to the mill may you find a boss as good as Clark and to the world may life continue and strive to be better. That is all of the habits for now. TTFN

Valentines Day

We are in the habit of celebrating Valentines day (well sort of) and this year we do it again only this time my absolutly wonderful husband wants to make dinner for me. It is a surprise and I have to admit I am excited. I am not sure what to expect but, I know it will be made with lots of love. this year we all got floppys and for some of you floppy is well known. A floppy: a loveable huggable floppy pal so soft and comfy no one can resist. I got one last year and again this year as well. I love valentines day it is a day of love and sharing for my sister and her Husband it is an anniversary so here is to a day of love for all. Thats all of our habits for now TTFN!

Saying Goodbye

we are in the habit of being sad when someone passes away. and yesterday is no different. yestarday someone Rich rerspected and enjoyed to have around passed away. not knowing what happened we sit and wonder why? Clark was so lively from the stories I heard and wedensday he seemed healthy. so yet again we ask the question why? I am hoping the funeral will be when Rich can go and say his goodbyes. although the world does not stop for death neither will his job. See Clark was Rich's boss and he knew him through his mom. the mill and the world will not be the same with out Clarks cheery what the He-- are you eating it looks like a cafe in here and then smile, or he would come in ask what they were doing he always made a point to go to the shop and look in. To his family I want to say there are no words to express how you feel and I can not pretend to know so I will keep you in my prayers and hope to make the journey to The Dalles once again only this time it is to say good bye not hello.